These are suggested for serving to recovering alcoholics, but I think they’re just fun and cool anyway? I like a fancy beverage, it doesn’t have to have booze. That cucumber Collins sounds refreshing AF

one of the rare posts where i actually have something cool to contribute.

depending on how much effort you’re willing to put into the process, you can make decently convincing non-alcoholic tequila and here’s how:

you’ll need half of a pineapple with the skin on, 1 liter of water, 40g chopped apricot (remove the pit), 30g agave syrup, 20g roasted unsalted peanuts, 12g whole black peppercorn, 2g kosher salt, 2 whole split and scraped vanilla beans, 50g parsley (leaves & stems), 25g peeled and thinly sliced ginger, 15g mint (also leaves & stems), 9g lime peel, 7g jalepeno (chopped & deseeded), and 4g bay leaves

what you want to do is remove the pineapple bark with a knife and chop it coarsely. save the fruit for something else.

combine the bark, water, apricot, agave syrup, peanuts, peppercorn, salt, and vanilla in a saucepan. bring this to a boil, cover the pot, and reduce the heat to a simmer for around an hour. let it cool and strain out the solids.

take the rest of the ingredients, muddle them to combine them, and let that steep at room temperature for 2 hours. strain out the solids again and put it in an airtight container in your fridge.

there you go. non alcoholic tequila. use it like regular tequila in your sunrise, ranch water, paloma, cantarito, or tequila mule. the people in your life who don’t want to drink for whatever reason and want something a bit more complex than juice will love you for this one.

this is the realest tweet i have ever seen in my life

That's what straight women are like

hey girl are you a worm because

goddammit. i hit post too early

hey girl are you a worm because i am hooked on you

actually i guess it would be. hey girl are you a hook because i am wormed on you

no it wouldn't that's nothing

hey girl are you a fishing rod because i am hooked on you

hey girl are you a fishing rod because i'd like to reel you in

hey girl. fish

hey fish girl, worm? Hook.

girl fish hand hook car door

Worm?

Come on and get in the boat, fish! Come on and get in the boat, fish fish!

There once was a doctor named Freud

who woman preferred to a-void

bitch loved his cocaine

But he couldn't explain

Hatsune Miku vocaloid

The thing that messes me up about the whole “the butler did it” trope is that we literally have no idea where it comes from.

The earliest known piece of detective fiction in which the butler, in fact, did it? Published in 1930.

The earliest known article calling out “the butler did it” as an egregious cliché in detective fiction? Published in 1928.

Obviously there must have been earlier examples of detective fiction in which the butler did it, but none of them have survived to the present day, leaving us in this bizarre situation where the earliest known callout post about the trope pre-dates its earliest known actual use by a full two years.

The butler hid the evidence 

moments like this remind me why i love the internet. bless Stray for making humanity unite over cats & video games

Everyone shut up and look at Lala.

ok but in stray when you first get your backpack, the cat walks funny with its back all low to the ground, and keeps flopping over.. like, that is exactly how a cat would act if you suddenly put a backpack on them

Stray didn’t have to be a visual masterpiece with really well written philosophical commentary on humanity and our own destruction and obsession with class division it could have just been a cute cat game but they did that 10/10